How Amazing it is that this blog is titled "Unexpected Miracles of Life" and this topic fits right into the title of the blog.
I have learned a deep lesson today, and that is to always expect the unexpected, because God will always show you the way... Even if it is not in your time, God will provide you an answer, eventually...
I used to think that Love at first sight didn't exist... but boy was I wrong..
Love at first sight is something that
most think is silly or doesn't exist.
It is a strong, romantic attraction
for someone you just met, and barely know.
I'm not sure if it was fate that
caused it, or if someone had other plans... but either way, there was such
an emotionally intimate connection between Chuck and I.
I never thought that I'd find myself
in the situation I was in, so soon. I had just gone through a mutual break up
from a relationship that lasted two years and had been very rough. After my
break-up, I found my hobby that I LOVED.
January 3rd 2013, I was hired as an
on air personality for Blade Radio which is essentially a DJ.
Upon joining the teamspeak server, I
met Corey, who went by Incinerator. I kept asking him when "Mystic"
which was Chuck's online alias, would be around. Chuck's position at Blade
Radio was Operations Manager, and so he was my "direct supervisor"
and he was the one who would be interviewing me and deciding if I would be
eligible to be hired.
I clicked on his avatar... and asked
Corey if those were really his blue eyes, or if it was photoshopped, and he was
all "Nah his eyes were photoshopped he really has brown eyes" I
remember asking when he would be around to do an interview, and Corey replied
"Probably late, like 2am" and so I waited.
And so the interview went on... As a
part of my interview, and a requirement to join staff, I was asked to
"sing" because some listeners would want to hear that on air, and so
the first thing that popped into my head was "Call me maybe" by Carly
Rae Jepson, because my four year old daughter had been singing it. At the end
of the interview, an innocent flirting remark opened my ears. He responded with
"What was that number again?" and at first, I ignored it, but then it
got me thinking...
The month went on, and innocent
flirting turned into hours and hours of talking. Feeling like I could tell him
absolutely anything and everything without being judged. Unconditional love.
Something I never thought was possible.
In my past relationships, I thought
love was being hit or beaten, because that was what I was used to, so it was
strange to finally be listened to, and loved for who I was. I liked it.
At first, I was not sure if it was
love, or lust, or if it was something other than that, because to be honest, neither
he nor I were looking for a relationship at the time, and the feeling just felt
almost too good to be true... but I took a chance.
I knew regardless of the response I
got, I was still going to make a trip to Cleveland to meet him, because anyone
could be anyone online, and I wanted to see if it was real. And I am so glad I
did make that trip.
As we talked, and I confessed my
love for him, something I did not normally do, as I was not the one who
generally admitted to feelings and asked guys out... I did not like the
response given that day. He tried to push me away because he was scared and
going through a lot in his life. I respected that, and I told him I was not
going anywhere, and regardless was still going to visit him.
Later that week, during a Skype
conversation, we were talking and he called me his girlfriend. My mouth
dropped. I could not believe it. I asked him what that meant for us, and he
said "It means were official" and I asked confused "What made
you change your mind?" and he responded "I don't know, something felt
different, I could finally be myself around you and I figure what the heck, you’re
not going anywhere so why not?"
Valentine’s Day 2013, he drove 12
hours from Cleveland, Ohio to Manchester, NH to pick me up. The plan was to
stay Feb 14th - 19th and arrive back home on February 20th.
Part of me didn't believe that he
would actually make that trip, but he did... Those 12 hours, were a bit
awkward, silent, and spent randomly talking about things... but I was so happy
to be away from everything and with him finally. During those days, I felt
total contentment with him. It just felt right.
Based on how we felt with each
other, during such a deep, intimate, emotional connection, that was so strong,
we decided that we would continue our relationship as boyfriend and girlfriend.
We confessed that we do both want to
get married someday and have children, and he admitted that he wanted to make
me his future wife, when the time was right. Things were just so perfectly
right. No words could describe it. Leaving was very hard to do. I did not want
to leave.
I returned home on February 21st,
and it was one of the hardest things to do, but I told myself I’d be back…
And I did return back… I traveled out
to see him again in March. The second time leaving, on March 17th,
was by far the most emotional. I did not want to leave. I wanted to stay with
him, because of how comforted and peaceful I felt. I cried the entire way home,
but told myself that I would be back soon, and I would be. April 5th-17th.
Each time, I continued to go out to
see him, and continued to travel to and from NH, a connection grew between us, more
and more. We couldn’t explain it, other than there was a divine intervention in
the works, and it was so amazing…
Some say a soul mate is someone who
has locks that fit our keys, and keys to fit our locks. In that sense, When I
feel safe enough to open the locks, my trust steps out and I can be completely
and honestly who I am; I can be loved for who I am and not for who I'm
pretending to be. Each connection unveils the best part of the other. No matter
what else goes wrong around that connection, with that one person I feel safe
in my own paradise.
It is said to recognize a soul mate you can do so by the supreme level of
comfort and security that you feel with that person. I feel that extreme level
of comfort and security when I am around Chuck and with him.
The extreme emotional connection
with that person that is unexplainable. And it is unexplainable. It is such a
deep intimate and emotional connection that one cannot understand unless they
have been there before and have their own soul mate. It is so much more than
love. It is that of a deeper connection. It is an agape type of love...
The Bible Says Agape is the highest form of love amongst the four types of love
in the Bible. Jesus Christ showed this kind of divine love to his Father and to
all humanity and has professed all human beings to show "agape"
towards each other. A soul mate is just that. An Agape type of love. That
doesn’t mean that there aren’t issues that may or may not come up or remain to
be ironed out. Rather, it means knowing intuitively that together, I can
resolve issues with that particular person without losing that love and
respect.
This is the type of love I have been feeling the last three months, and it is
amazing. It’s not about looks that make you the cutest couple. It’s about the
personality, the strength, the way you make each other feel, and so much
more.
I cannot even explain the feeling I
get when I am around him or talking to him. True love. On an emotional, and
intimate level... that is what I was looking for, and I finally got an answered
prayer... total contentment... total trust.... total commitment.... total
love... for both myself, and my daughter... and looking back to that day, I am
so glad I told him how I felt, and took that chance, because he might have never
been mine...
Which brings me to now…
Chuck and I have been having some
tribulations… in our life… some things that are very serious, and
unfortunately, I can’t go into details and won’t go into details about them at
this time, but I just could not seem to find comfort any other way, and so I
turned to the one person who I prayed to originally, to show me love and
guidance, and asked him the same thing.
I prayed to God and asked him to
provide me strength, comfort, guidance, and love, and to show me what was
right, and guide me along the way, as to what he wanted for me. I asked him to
watch over Chuck and his brother, and the children’s mother, and asked him to
show us all what we needed with our lives… and then I went to sleep… after
hours of praying…
I had a dream… and in that dream,
God spoke to me… and he told me to trust him, and to ask Chuck to marry me… and
trust that he had a plan for both of us… and I thought at first, it was a very
strange plan…
The last time I had heard God talk
to me, was when I was facing a homeless situation, of paying rent, or paying my
electricity in Ft Myers, and God had very blatantly told me to pay the electric
and trust him, and so I did…
Anytime God speaks to me, I do as he
says, because I fear consequences, but I just thought it was a little odd that
he was asking me to ask Charles to marry me, because generally it is a guy
asking a girl, but considering the odds against us at the moment, I said, why
not… Chuck responded with:
“April... April...
April... what am I going to do with you" and I said "That’s a fully
loaded question" and I say "why" and he says "well, this
lovely woman sent me a youtube video, and I watched it a few times, and
cried" and then he goes "you always have a way to put me on the
spot... there is no way I can top that proposal... but I've got a lifetime to
try"
And so I asked him, is that a yes? And he said… one moment…
And he hopped onto the team speak server and announced it to
everyone… that we were engaged, and I was his fiancée…
I’m so happy… it’s been so long since I’ve been engaged,
and never have I ever felt this happy… with anyone… and It would make me
nothing more than happier than to Marry Charles, because he truly is the man of
my dreams, and I thank God for the answered prayers he gave to both of us…
So that’s pretty much our story…
Born: June 25th 2009
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